Monday, June 11, 2012

I am...

A Mother,Wife,Friend,Sister,Daughter and a Child of God.

I AM A SURVIVOR.

I have survived chemotherapy, 15 surgeries and 3 knee replacements. I survived and mourned the loss of my teenage years gone to a terrible disease that left devestation in its wake. I survived not only losing one friend to cancer but 4 more in the years that followed. I survived broken dreams and really the loss of a life that I would never have but so desprately longed for. I survived the divorce of my parents and the sadness of our family being broken.

 I AM A SURVIVOR.
  sur·vive To carry on despite hardships or trauma; persevere

I feel like that has always been my life story, especially for the past 14 years. I have persevered; Not because I am strong but because I didn't a have choice. I had to be strong. I made a choice on August 24, 1998 that I was not going to let 3 words define what I was going to make of my life. You Have Cancer. No, those 3 words will not define my life. I'M A SURVIVOR. Those 3 words have defined who I am in so many ways. I can probably plug those words into so many aspects of my life and not just those to do with cancer. May 10, 1999 marked day one of surviorship. I have accomplished more in my life then I ever imagine for myself on that day 13 years ago. I am a Mother. That title was taken from me at age 15. I was told I would never be able to have children. A wall I spent 10 years building around my heart came crashing down when I held my son for the first time in 2008. He makes my life so vibrant and full of joy. I could not imagine my life without him. Being a parent now I could not even fathom the thought of him having to go through what I endured as a child.

I started this blog several years ago as a way to share my writing. I have always loved writing. I started in 5th grade writing in a journal and continued through my stuggle with cancer. That journey didn't end when I stopped chemo. This blog has become more then I have ever imagined!! I spent hours upon hours searching the internet when I got sick. Hoping to find others just like me. I never imagined, many years later, I would be a voice to those just starting their own journey. I decided almost 14 years ago that I was going to make all the pain, suffering and sacrifice worth something. I was going to make a difference in lives of others. I feel that I am living that dream. I receive email after email of other patients, both young and old, reaching out to me to find encouragment, advice and just HOPE. I feel blessed and honored to still be here after so many years!! So to all who have followed me on this roller coaster ride, THANK YOU! Thank you for your support, advice, shoulder to cry on and beyond. I am not here today because of what I have done alone. I have had so many people beside me every step of the way. I pray God continues to bless me with MANY more years of life, so that I may bring HOPE to others.

2 comments:

  1. Reading your blog gives me encouragement. Thank you!

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  2. That is always nice to hear!! Thank you!

    ReplyDelete